Momisms…

I’ve been sitting here trying to scrounge up some memories of mom on Mother’s Day, and to my disappointment, I’m not coming up with as many as I thought. Note to self – sit down and come up with more! Mom’s been gone more than 17 years now and I am forgetting a lot of things. Not surprisingly, I remember the arguments and problems more than the good or amusing stuff. I think now is the time to refresh my memory. Mom is due for some remembrances. So here’s what I got for now, and maybe I’ll write another post later when I remember more and connect some dots.

Momisms:

“This too shall pass.” – usually said to me while I was moaning about a never-ending problem or was getting over-the-top about an unreflected problem. I know this is a pretty standard phrase, but I associate it with mom and when I fall back on ruminating, I say it and automatically think of her. I then usually chill…at least a little.

“Why do you care about what other people that you don’t even know think of you?!” I think it was something close to this, but it might have been phrased a little bit differently. If I got upset about a look or a perceived look or some other perceived or not slight, I got this question/statement in response. And I’ve referred back to this one, too. I think I’ve internalized this one a bit more than when I was a teenager, but it still gets pulled out of storage on occasion.

“It all goes to the same place.” This is a classic kid momism. It was a no-no to little Pam to have the dreaded vegetables accidentally migrate into the meat or potatoes (we were a meat and potato household all the way!) It was quite the catastrophe to have something not liked intertwine with something I liked – it then poisoned what I liked. I usually would reel back in horror and then mom would say… And she’s right, it does all go to the same place. And I could always separate the vegetable out if I absolutely had to. Somehow, life didn’t end if I got a vegetable in the potatoes (shocking.)

“Guess what I bought today?!” (usually said in February) After a few years, I knew exactly what she bought because she’d always happily chirp this one after she’d bought the (IMHO) offending item. And not surprisingly, mom knew that none of us, including my father, were looking forward to it and would not be excited. Mom adored asparagus and was always fervently looking for it at the store in February when it usually first showed up for the season. She was always gleeful at the sullen looks and rolled eyes that surrounded her at the dinner table when she said this and triumphantly placed the lovely bowl of new asparagus on the table. Then she would start offering to place some spears on our plates. YUM.

“You would look cute with a shag haircut.” After hearing this one forever, I gave in, even though I didn’t want it. She still believed it after I got it. I still hated it and never got one again. Not surprisingly, there are no pictures of this debacle posted here!

“Get that d***ed dog out of here!” I am laughing at this one, hearing it in my head. Mom liked to stay up late and watch movies or whatever. She was the only night owl in our house. My father always grumbled when he had to shut the living room TV off and wake her up from the chair to tell her to go to bed. As a result, mom often liked to sleep late (unlike the rest of us.) If we wanted mom up or we thought she’d slept long enough (somehow 8 or 9 AM is popping into my head,) we’d send in our beloved dog Holly into the bedroom. She’d be around the bed in two seconds and would start licking my sleeping mom’s face (the bed was the same height as Snout) and would whine in excitement. Then we would all hear this being yelled, which would rev up Holly even more. Mission accomplished, with great amusement.

Well, not all these memories are mom wisdom, but they are honest and amusing memories of mom. I don’t think she’d mind me remembering her today with some laughter, even at her expense. It helps me get through the day without her here…

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Boring day

Not many ideas or thoughts lately. Just doing mundane tasks like cutting the grass again, cleaning out the sent messages and the inbox (two hours there), catching up on my Fortunes and reading Costco Connection. Nothing too earth shattering here.

And of course, it’s mother’s day, a nonevent for me for 17 years. Only thing I managed to do this year was get a kid to the store so he would actually buy his mom a gift. Otherwise, not much happening. Maybe inspiration will strike soon, but sometimes I don’t think you can force it.

Time to try and clean out the inbox some more…fun…

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